2023

 

Lately, it feels as though inspiration has become a rare guest in my life, elusive and fleeting. Yet, when it graces me with its presence, I drop everything, immersing myself in the rush of emotions and thoughts clamoring for release. I'm compelled to capture them on paper, fearing they might otherwise slip into the abyss of forgotten memories.

Today marks the beginning of the Lunar New Year, a time when I vow to honor my traditions—embracing rest and reflection on the year's passage. Despite this, the looming deadline for my Biostatistics final beckoned, urging me to cast aside relaxation in favor of completion.

With that task behind me, my mind feels unburdened, free to entertain a singular, focused thought instead of being a battleground for a myriad of ideas. Here I am, seated at my desk, the patio door ajar, letting in the symphony of birds quarreling over the remnants in the feeder. A reminder tugs at my conscience to replenish their supply—a task both simple and momentarily pressing. The appearance of a family of red-winged blackbirds on my patio captivates me. Their ebony plumes, adorned with vibrant red-orange streaks, are a spectacle of nature that halts my pen, inviting me to simply be in awe.

The air carries the crispness of 56 degrees, while nearby, the tantalizing aroma of something grilling wafts over, igniting a hunger within me for the unknown delicacy.

Reflecting on the swift passage of this past year, the year of the rabbit, it's no wonder it felt like it raced by. Yet, within that swift passage, my life has transformed profoundly. I transitioned from a job that drained me to one that brings joy and fulfillment, teaching me the value of being a compassionate colleague and friend. This year, a health scare served as a stark reminder to cherish and care for myself, acknowledging the reality of aging as I approach 42—a number that still astonishes me.

Love, too, has been a teacher—revealing the limits of my heart when faced with the demands of life. The end of a significant relationship underscored the harsh lessons of neglect and the complexities of fear and self-doubt. Yet, I remain committed to healing the wounds left in its wake.

Bernice, my trusty old Chevy, signaled the end of an era, retiring after years of faithful service and countless memories. Her replacement brings with it a reminder of the passage of time and the changes in our journeys.

To those new friends who've joined me in this chapter of my life, your patience and presence have been a gift. My stories may meander, taking the scenic route, but I promise the journey will be worth it.

To anyone who's been part of this journey, your companionship is treasured. Our journey is far from over, and I sense that the road ahead holds even more adventures and stories to share. Thank you for being here, for listening, and for walking this path with me. 

Let's embrace the promise of what's yet to come.

I hope to see you in 2024