It's 10:25pm on a Sunday night...

  ...I should really be in bed getting ready for my day tomorrow. GT!L (Gym, Tacos, Laundry). It's my last day off before a long work week. It's my favorite week at some of my favorite sites for work. I'm siting at my dining room table, pajamas on and some nice chamomile tea in my favorite mug in left hand. Lately I've spent a lot of time with the guy I call “bae” or “gordita” as I like to call him. We're pretty new. It was something unexpected but like with any relationship, there's been some growing pains.

Many people on my social media have seen him or glimpses of him because I don't ever post his complete face on my social media. It's something we've both chosen to do. It's a different approach and I have to say I like it. He's a great guy. Even though I'm older than him, he's offered wisdom beyond his years. He's given patience I don't even have. I have to give credit, where credit is due. He's given me a lot more than just a relationship. He's given me a family.

With the few months we've spent together we've been through some things and it's brought us closer if anything. The worst of it wasn't even issues with the relationship rather happenings that come with having a family and having siblings. More specifically little brothers. His little brother which I call my little brother, has been having his fair share of issues and through all this I just want to love him more and tell him that whatever he's going through right now, won't always be the way things are. He misunderstood and that's a common state of mind for 13 year old boys. I should know! I was once one. A long, long time ago.

His mom welcomed me with open arms and treats me like I'm one of her own. She spoils me so much! I think that bae is a little jealous at times. She is a sweet and caring woman who's heart is as big as the headache her sons give her! I've seen her struggle and seen her pain all which she carries with such grace and poise. When it seems like she would break because of all the stressors and turbulence she has to endure, she keeps that smile on her face and laughter in her voice. By very definition she is a champion! I've seen her tears and a cry that was uncontrollable which hurt me down to my soul. Seeing a woman who cares for me, tells me she cares for me constantly and always makes sure I have food in my belly, really broke me. If I'm lucky enough to be in her life for the rest of mine, then I will do what I can with what I can to lessen her load and make sure she has something to smile about.

With all that's been happening lately I just needed to get that out. My mind has been clouded with worry. Thank you for listening. May you have an amazing week. Sweet dreams.